Frequently Ask Questions

Divorce mediation and custody mediation are ways to resolve your divorce or custody dispute which let you keep full control of the outcome. The only people making decisions are those involved in the dispute, unlike arbitration or litigation where a judge or an arbitrator makes the final decision. Read More.

We are divorce and custody mediators serving greater Los Angeles. We know that divorce is about peace of mind as well as the legal divorce, and we pride ourselves on our client-centered approach in divorce and family law mediation. Read More.

Divorce mediation is most efficient when you come to your mediation session prepared with some basic information. The better informed you are about your assets, liabilities, children's schedules, and your goals for the outcome of your situation, the more progress we can make in your mediation session. Read More.

Every divorce starts with a Petition. The Petition package is a set of papers that lists your address, the date of your marriage, the names and dates of birth of your children, an extremely basic outline of your property and whether or not you'd like spousal support, among other things. The Petition can be amended later if you change your mind about any of these items. Read More.

Do you really want to spend your children's college education account, your vacation money, and the full value of your home on your divorce? Consider divorce mediation or custody mediation as a lower-cost, lower-stress alternative. Read More.

There are several options for how to contact the other party and suggest mediation. Talk to us and let us know what you think would be best. Read More.

As mediators, we’re trained to discuss your situation in a neutral way with both sides. Typically our Dispute Resolution Associate (DRS) have at least one telephone conversation with each party prior to your first mediation session because it’s important that everyone involved has confidence in the mediation process. In this way we are careful to avoid appearing to side with either party or the other. By having a neutral Dispute Resolution Associate speak with both parties before the mediation begins, you’ll get a chance to let us know your situation without feeling like whoever spoke to the mediator first will be “the favorite” in the mediation session.

We also offer a free half-hour mediation orientation session so that you and your spouse or parent of your child can come in and meet us together, and decide if you’d like to work with us. Read More.

A lawyer is not required to get divorced in California.
Like so many things, however, just because it’s legal doesn’t mean it’s a good idea. At Peace Talks, we encourage people to use lawyers’ and other professionals’ time wisely and cost-effectively to suit their needs and level of comfort. That may mean you speak to a lawyer for an hour, or it may mean that you hire a lawyer to represent you during the mediation sessions. It depends on what you feel you need the lawyer to do.

How Do I Know if I Need A Lawyer During Divorce Mediation?
Whether or not you need to have a lawyer depends on many factors. Generally, it’s a good idea to at least consult a mediation-friendly attorney no matter how comfortable you are with what you know about your family’s situation and your legal rights.

Most people speak with a lawyer at least for an hour or two to get an idea of how California’s laws might apply in their particular case, and to get an idea of a “best case” and “worst case” outcome for their case. You can use that information to formulate proposals in mediation and to negotiate with your spouse. It helps to have some guidelines and professional advice. Some people hire a lawyer to review a proposed agreement to see if it’s fair. These are all cost-effective ways to use a lawyer’s help in your case.

At Peace Talks, we welcome your lawyer’s input and participation, but we also deal with many clients who elect not to be represented by a lawyer, too.

How much representation you’ll want or need depends on your level of comfort with your knowledge of your family’s finances, custody situation and legal rights, as well as your budget. If you’re feeling uncomfortable with any of these issues, you probably need to at least consult with a lawyer for an hour or two. If you’re feeling very uncomfortable about these issues, you may wish to hire a lawyer to represent you for the entire case, even if you intend to participate in mediation.

Yes. Just let us know about your conciliation court date so that we can schedule your mediation session as soon as possible. When you reach an agreement in mediation, you can submit your agreement to court and cancel your appointment with conciliation court and family court services.

Yes. Attorneys are always welcome at Peace Talks. Some mediation clients bring attorneys with them to each mediation session, and some clients simply consult with their attorney in between mediation sessions. Just let us know whether your attorney will be coming with you to your mediation session(s) so that we can plan ahead. If you need a referral to an attorney who can advise you individually while supporting the mediation process, just let us know. We have a great referral list of terrific mediation-friendly attorneys.

If you’ve been kept in the dark about your finances throughout your marriage, if you’ve been the victim of domestic violence, or there is an extreme imbalance of power in your relationship, you should probably see a lawyer before beginning mediation or any divorce proceedings.

What About Other Professionals?
Lawyers aren’t the only professionals who can help with your divorce. For example, you may also want to speak to an accountant about the tax ramifications of your decisions and options for saving money on taxes, or you may want to speak to a child psychologist before deciding on a parenting plan.

At Peace Talks, we have lists of other professionals you may find helpful, and are happy to give you a recommendation.

As mediators, we can give you legal information, but not individualized legal advice.
At Peace Talks, we feel strongly about client education. We have a Client Library full of divorce and legal information which is free and open to the public, and we have many worksheets and handouts that cover all aspects of legal information. They are available on our web site.

We give every client a copy of Your Divorce Advisor: A Lawyer and a Psychologist Guide You Through the Legal and Emotional Landscape of Divorce (Fireside 2001). Diana Mercer, a mediator at Peace Talks, wrote this book, and you can also order it from www.Amazon.com It’s important to us that you know your rights and that you’re comfortable with your decisions.

You’ll need to speak with your individual lawyer for legal advice, and how the legal information you gather might be applied to your benefit in your individual case.

When you speak to a lawyer is mostly a matter of personal preference. Some people consult with a lawyer just once or twice, and others hire a lawyer to represent them before and during the mediation. Plenty of people wait until an agreement has been drafted, and take the agreement and financial disclosures to a lawyer to review to make sure it’s fair under the circumstances.

When and if to consult with a lawyer depends on your needs, preferences and, to some extent, your budget.

Many people speak to a lawyer before going into mediation in order to plan for the mediation session. If you know your rights and a likely “best case” and “worst case” outcome for your case, you can formulate sensible proposals to use in your mediation session(s).

Other people wait until they’re in mediation to speak to a lawyer. That way, they have an idea of what their spouse’s income and assets are as well as their spouse’s position with respect to finances and custody. The lawyer helps them to figure out the next steps in coming to an agreement, to make fair proposals based on California law.

Some people hire a lawyer to represent them before the mediation and have their lawyer participate in the mediation sessions. Others hire a lawyer more like a mediation “coach” and use the lawyer only for advice and counseling, not to attend the mediation sessions, but to help them plan, find out more about the family finances, make sure their rights are protected and formulate proposals for use in the mediation sessions.

At Peace Talks Mediation, your mediator may suggest that you consult with a mediation-friendly attorney if he or she sees that you’re at all unsure about your legal rights or a likely outcome in Court

A mediation-friendly attorney is a family lawyer who will advise you about your rights, likely outcomes in court, and a “best case” and “worst case” scenario in your case. He or she will advise you as to your individual rights like any litigation lawyer might. A mediation-friendly lawyer, however, will advise and coach you without derailing the mediation process. He or she believes in the mediation process, and although he or she will advocate for your position, it will be done in a way so that you can continue in mediation rather than going through litigation and the Court system.

Your rights will be protected without having to go to Court.

For example, if your spouse has made an offer about spousal support, your mediation-friendly attorney may advise you that the offer is too low or too high, too short or too long, but rather than running to court, he or she will provide you with information about how a court might view the situation, discuss the pros and cons of going to court, help you develop facts and arguments to support your position, and come up with several alternatives to your spouse’s offer which make sense in your circumstances.

Most mediation-friendly attorneys will work with you on an hourly basis, rather than insisting that you hire them for the entire case. This is called “limited legal services” or “unbundled services”. You hire them just for the time you need them, or the task you need them for, rather than the entire case. It’s an ala carte alternative to traditional representation.

At Peace Talks, we can refer you to a mediation-friendly attorney if you wish

One of the great things about mediation is that you can invite professionals to the mediation sessions (by agreement of both parties, of course) who can be very helpful with joint questions.

If you and your spouse have specialized questions about things like taxes, budgeting, or the value of a business or piece of property, sometimes it’s helpful to have an accountant or appraiser come to a mediation session to discuss these issues with you both at the same time. Therapists can help with child-related issues. All professionals who participate in the sessions sign the confidentiality agreement so that your interests are protected, and the mediation process’ confidentiality is preserved.

If I Hire a Lawyer, Can My Lawyer Be Involved in Mediation Sessions?
Yes, as long as both you and your spouse agree that your lawyers will be involved prior to the mediation sessions, and that both have agreed in writing that lawyers can attend the mediation sessions or have contact with the mediators outside of sessions. We can discuss this in more detail during the free mediation orientation if you wish.

Can Our Children Be Involved In The Divorce Mediation Sessions or Custody Mediation Sessions?
Sometimes children can be involved, depending on their age and maturity. We can discuss whether to include the children in the sessions when and if it becomes an issue, but we always start by meeting the parents first and hearing their concerns without the children present.

Are There Any Clients You Don’t Accept For Mediation?
We are willing to try and help any couple who is willing to negotiate in good faith, and who will agree to participate fully.

Every divorce starts with a Petition. The Petition ‘package’ is a set of papers that lists your address, the date of your marriage, the names and dates of birth of your children, an extremely basic outline of your property and whether or not you’d like spousal support, among other things. The Petition can be amended later if you change your mind about any of these items.

Can My Mediator Handle all of the Paperwork for Us?
Yes. Peace Talks Mediation can prepare, file, and serve all of the necessary paperwork for you for a flat fee. We have both an attorney and a paralegal on staff.
If you prefer, you have other options for filing the paperwork, including doing it yourself, hiring a paralegal or document preparation service, or hiring another lawyer to prepare the paperwork for you. Either way, the basic procedure is the same.

Do We Need to Agree Before Filing the Divorce Petition?
It isn’t necessary to reach an agreement before the Petition is filed. Many people file the Petition before even starting mediation because California has a mandatory 6 month waiting period to finalize a divorce–which leaves plenty of time to negotiate an agreement. Because the Petition contains just basic information, which can be amended later, in mediation the Petition’s purpose is to simply open your file with the Court and to get the waiting period started.

Does it Make a Difference Who Files the Divorce Petition?
It doesn’t make much difference who files the Petition. Legally, the difference between the Petitioner (the person who files the Petition) and the Respondent (the person who receives the Petition) is very subtle. For example, in the event of a trial, the Petitioner gets to choose whether or not to be the first to testify in court. As a practical matter, over 98% of all divorce cases settle before a trial. As you can see, in most cases, legally it won’t matter who files the Petition.

It may make a difference to you emotionally who files the Petition, however, because the Petitioner is the person who is legally asking the Court for the divorce. For many Couples , this is an emotionally meaningful decision.

How Does the Petition Get to the Other Person?
Once the Petition package has been filed with the Court, it must be served on the Respondent (the person receiving the petition). This service of process can be done by mail. When the Respondent receives the Petition in the mail, he or she simply signs a receipt that says he or she received the papers. This receipt is called a Notice and Acknowledgment of Receipt and it simply states that the Respondent received the papers—not that he or she agrees with the papers or the divorce in general.

If the Respondent won’t sign the Notice and Acknowledgment of Receipt, he or she needs to be served with the papers. Typically, an Attorney Service is hired to serve the papers. This costs between $50 and $200, depending on how difficult it is to find the Respondent to deliver the papers.

Obviously, signing the Notice and Acknowledgement of Receipt is easier, faster and cheaper than having the Respondent served. It’s also more private and less embarrassing.

What Does The Other Person Do After Receiving the Divorce Petition?
Once the Petition papers have been served, the Respondent has 30 days to file a Response. The Response is basically the same as the Petition, only it’s filed by the Respondent. The Court’s filing fee for the Response in Los Angeles County is $320.00. Your check should be made payable to the “Clerk of the Superior Court”.

In mediation, some Respondents decide not to bother with a Response if it looks as though an agreement will be reached soon. The Court’s “Response” filing fee is then paid when the agreement is filed, since no Response has been filed. At Peace Talks, we encourage Respondents to file a Response, and prepare it along with the Petition for one flat fee.

What is the Filing Fee for a Divorce?
The Court’s filing fee for the Petition in Los Angeles County is $320.00. Your check should be made payable to the “Clerk of the Superior Court”. The filing fee is different in different counties, and it changes from time to time, so double check the fee on your local court’s web site before filing your Petition.

Yes. Peace Talks Mediation Services helps many Couples who are already in the process of a divorce, custody, modification hearing or court case. We can help you resolve your issues so that you can submit your agreement to court and avoid expensive litigation and court dates.

Yes. Just let us know about your court date when you call so that we can schedule your mediation session as soon as possible. When you reach an agreement in mediation, you can submit it to court and cancel your court date. When you reach an agreement in mediation, you can avoid litigation and having to go to court.